—September 3, 2018 @ 12:10 pm
A person who is insecure by definition lacks confidence and is unsure.
They tend to have anxiety and paranoia’s about things that a confident person doesn’t have.
It is important that parents build their children up. Reinforcement by way of encouraging dialogue should begin when the child is able to engage in conversation.
Beginning at birth, a parent can begin to tell their child how smart, beautiful/handsome, intelligent, and how much of an asset they are to the planet.
The goal is to implant positive affirmations into the subconscious. This way the child’s mind will begin to yield positive thoughts and energy.
This is half the battle.
The other half includes providing a safe, positive, and nurturing environment during the child’s development up until they are an adult (18).
If you fail to do these things during the child development and rearing ages, you leave them prone to develop into becoming an insecure adult.
This adult grows up to find a companion. They look for this companion to alter their perception of life, and make it positive one. In their mind, life is a half empty cup and their partner must make it full. The part of their “metaphorical cup” is filled with negativity, uncertainty, pain and strife, but somehow their expectation is to meet someone to change this.
In essence, they are looking for someone who has the power of the universe, a “god like” figure, what some would refer to as Christ. This is the ONLY entity that is capable of filling such a broken individual, with the help of therapy.
These individuals (the insecure) are like broken glass waiting for someone to glue all their pieces back together, smooth them out, and make them whole. They are looking for YOU to make them the person they were prior to their brokenness. This can be a subconscious desire.
This is impossible.
No one choses to be broken.
No one chooses unforeseen occurences.
No one chooses tragedy or to be victimized.
Remaining broken and maintaining the role of a victim is a choice.
It is a choice to seek understanding and professional help.
It is also a choice not to.
There is no amount of love, gifts, compromise, kind words, or actions that will satisfy an adult that is insecure.
The spouse that the insecure enters into a relationship with begins to try to “cure the insecure”.
Although, efforts of showing love through actions and words should still be a practice in the relationship. It shouldn’t be done with the expectation of becoming the solution. It should be done because love eventually conquers all.
Everyone needs someone (the right one, with the right amount of patience) to love them through whatever their challenges are.
If you are insecure/ broken, that is okay. It is okay to feel however you feel.
It is not okay is to project your insecurities on others. It is not okay to manipulate others (especially those you love) into feeling that they are the root behind your issues.
If you are dealing with someone that is broken and insecure, continue to love them and be patient. Encourage them to get the appropriate help they need.
If you are the one that is insecure and broken, own up to what is going on with yourself. There is nothing to be ashamed of. Appreciate your support system and follow up by getting the help you need.
The failure is not in the problem or issues we face. The problem is in the failure to address and solve the issue.